In Israel, there is a very nice custom in which the birthday person gives special blessings to those around her. I happen to be celebrating a special birthday (no not an even number, I just think all my birthdays are very special). In this tradition, I bestow my blessings upon you.
May your home look the same way when you walk in the door after a long day as you did when you left it. May there be no cups on the table, crumbs on the floor or food in the TV room.
Unless of course you want your home to look different from what you left in the morning. Then I wish that for you.
May your teenagers answer their phones whenever you call them.
May they still have their phones for you to call them.
May all your cabinet doors be closed, especially if you're standing up after bending over to get something. And if it wasn't may the swear words that pour forth from your mouth go unheard by your teenagers.
May your car stop making that funny noise that sounds like this: KA-CHING.
May your boss not tell you, when you ask for a raise, "Excellent timing, Bibi is making us give you a cost-of-living raise of .02%".
May your dog always greet you at the door (because L-rd knows your teenagers won't).
(For you younger moms--this is an equal opportunity blog)--May your kids get into and out of their carseats by themselves (including the 'click'), shower by themselves and yes, wipe themselves. On that note, may you be able to use the bathroom by yourselves, with the door closed.
(For the men out there): May you always shower your women with compliments and love. You know they deserve it, even when they order you around.
May your children always forget to log out of their facebook pages so you can see what's going on in their lives.
And may you find no surprises there when you do.
May you always get a cart at the supermarket with wheels that work. (Hey, a girl can dream.)
And may you be in the fast lane when you get to the cashier.
And may the cashier say to you, "Would you like some help with the bagging?"
May you always remember what you went upstairs to get. Or at least remember it before you give up and go back downstairs.
May the TV show you are downloading do so quickly.
May your printer always have ink.
May your internet always be up.
May your blogs be filled with comments [almost] as witty as your post.
And finally may your lives be filled with health, prosperity, peace and love and many, many more birthdays.
Oy, the Guilt
1 week ago