tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post9180941418263555374..comments2024-03-27T13:26:48.484-07:00Comments on I'll call Baila: Never let 'em see you sweatBailahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14115498582378133552noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-59093883308712388722008-08-29T05:26:00.000-07:002008-08-29T05:26:00.000-07:00I would think one of the hardest things for older ...I would think one of the hardest things for older kids, especially teenagers, who come on <I>aliyah</I>, is to become culturally acclimated. So much of language acquistion, and the school experience, is culturally based. Israeli-born parents are, in most ways, better equipped to help their kids through the school system here because they themselves grew up in it. Kids who come from abroad and don't have the body language, linguistic style, musical familiarity, and many, many other things, are automatically at a loss.<BR/><BR/>Re: <I>bagruyot</I>, we have high school kids in the hospital who have completely amazed us, getting chemo while they take their exams, lying down in bed! The kids who do this have chosen to do it, sometimes because they don't want to miss out and fall behind, but often because they are excellent students, and good scholastic performance is a major focus of their identities. As long as they continue to focus on this identity throughout their illness, they find it to be an amazing source of strength for themselves (and for those of us around them).A Living Nadneydahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14365370597831368062noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-20899363038647423952008-08-28T08:38:00.000-07:002008-08-28T08:38:00.000-07:00As I've said to you before, you inspire me. Sound...As I've said to you before, you inspire me. Sounds to me like you're doing great. You have had a few little meltdowns, which I think are routine for the five stages of aliyah (which I would link to right now, if we had already had our educational coffee experience). :-)<BR/><BR/>Keep what you are doing. You sound like a very fine and balanced parent to me.<BR/><BR/>NB: Watch out for all the photo ops once you adopt those cute little Africans. They can go to your head. It's not good for the kids.rutimizrachihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06809119908148195009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-44176219738357925982008-08-26T12:17:00.000-07:002008-08-26T12:17:00.000-07:00It sounds like you're working hard on finding a go...It sounds like you're working hard on finding a good balance.<BR/><BR/>Aliyah and all that it entails _is_ a hard adjustment, and many times, I felt guilty that our kids were getting the brunt of it. (Ten years later <I>b"ah</I>, they are often mistaken for native Israelis.)<BR/><BR/>I agree with you that it's very important to make sure not to fall apart on the kids - on top of everything else they're going through. That would just be one change too many. As it is, family dynamics change with aliyah - the kids now know all sorts of things that we do not, and our Hebrew (or at least our accents) will never approach theirs. If the parents suddenly change their parenting style as well, I imagine that it would make life even harder for the kids.Mrs. S.https://www.blogger.com/profile/14649082640953110457noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-61592926814580068122008-08-26T08:31:00.000-07:002008-08-26T08:31:00.000-07:00I-D,Nah, I'm not beating myself over this. I've l...I-D,<BR/><BR/>Nah, I'm not beating myself over this. I've learned enough to know that everything in life is a process. How can we learn if we don't make mistakes?<BR/><BR/>Leora,<BR/><BR/>I understand about the aches because you're dreading schools. I didn't mean to imply the kids are faking it--it's a psychosomatic thing. But I don't think the correct response is to let them stay home. Sooner or later they have to face the music. (BTW, this behavior decreased significantly towards the middle of the year.)<BR/><BR/>And I don't who's more nervous about the bagruiot--Liat or me.<BR/><BR/>CK,<BR/><BR/>I will never completely give up the Jolie-Pitt free spirit method of parenting. As a matter of fact, Isaac and I are planning to hop over to Africa to adopt a couple of kids. You know, the multicultural thing.<BR/><BR/>Fern,<BR/><BR/>They only pay a nickel for that. And Maor could probably tell you everything you need to know about bagruiot.Bailahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14115498582378133552noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-59504417606547919312008-08-26T07:15:00.000-07:002008-08-26T07:15:00.000-07:00what a great post baila! boy, if i had a dime for ...what a great post baila! boy, if i had a dime for every time i'm sure i've completely screwed up the young 'un's life, i'd be really rich (different issues of course). <BR/>anyway, sounds like you're going in the right direction. and i'd love an explanation about bagruot sometime.Fern Chasidahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15319933202457991096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-21600767727129289312008-08-26T06:28:00.000-07:002008-08-26T06:28:00.000-07:00I'm listening very closely!CKP.S. But please don't...I'm listening very closely!<BR/>CK<BR/>P.S. But please don't say that you are completely abandoning the Jolie-Pitt free spirit method of parenting!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-84735305535413400052008-08-26T06:16:00.000-07:002008-08-26T06:16:00.000-07:00Sometimes in life you make a decision, and it turn...Sometimes in life you make a decision, and it turns out to be harder than you thought. You live with it. I hope you'll grow from it, as will your kids. I can understand wanting to stay home with a small ache if school is too hard, too challenging, too strange. I was never good at transitions, and I got sick a lot when I went to Israel at 17.<BR/><BR/><I>Bagruiot</I><BR/>My neighbor survived all of these. She talks about these exams as though they were the hardest she's ever taken. She's now a prof at an Ivy League university, so it's not like she didn't have more challenges after. But at least for sciences, Israeli education can be very strong.<BR/><BR/>Keep writing about all this stuff. We'll keep listening.Leorahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12303493764579879710noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5763532437435602439.post-3609010084195376352008-08-26T05:48:00.000-07:002008-08-26T05:48:00.000-07:00You seem to have thought a lot before moving and y...You seem to have thought a lot before moving and you still ponder a lot about doing things right so don't beat yourself. I am sure you show your kids you know how they feel and this is great.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com